5 posts tagged “household chores”

Chris Tivo'd Kid Nation, and I sat down with him last week to watch the second episode. He filled me in on the different personalities as we watched, and I found it interesting, though a bit of a stretch. (Pioneers who knew kids were going to be living in their town in a hundred years? I think they're taking the notion of suspension of disbelief a bit too far.)

Anyway, there's one little girl on the town council (Taylor, I think, is her name) who is an absolute pearl. (Those who know me understand when I call someone a "pearl", it's the furthest thing from a compliment. Pearls, after all, are created through constant irritation.) Moreover, judging by this girl's retort to everything ("Deal with it!"), I imagine her mother is a pearl, too. She's a cute little girl, but, despite her very young age, this kid is already a raving witch.

This weekend didn't go nearly as planned. I was seriously hoping to have some "me" time, even just a few minutes, but then Chris came down with something early Saturday morning and was bedridden most of the weekend. Which meant I was basically looking after the baby solo the whole time.

So much for finding the "me" in "mommy".

But rather than resigning myself to the notion that my weekend plans were now completely thwarted, I took a page from Taylor's book and told myself, "Deal with it."

Laundry needs to be done? Deal with it. Stick the baby in his bouncy seat, make sure he's got something to play with to keep him happy for a few minutes, and do it.

Need to fold the laundry? Deal with it. Put the baby in his crib, and when he starts to get angry because he wants to turn over, then because he turned over and didn't want to, reassure him that you're sitting right next to him and just finish the job.

Making dinner for Sunday? Deal with it. Stick the baby in his Bumbo, hand him his teething keys, talk him through the adventures of peeling a potato and cutting mushrooms (love my egg slicer, by the way, and I've never used it for eggs), and toss everything into a crock pot.

It doesn't sound like much, but these are things that I've had trouble completing for quite some time. I even read a book over the weekend while I was feeding him! (Okay, it was a parenting book, but it was still a grown-up book!) I kept my hair appointment (accompanied by the baby), went grocery shopping (alone on Saturday, then with the baby for a few extra things on Sunday), switched out the infant carrier/car seat base in my car for his "big boy" convertible seat, and let the baby sample freshly mashed avocado (which he liked, though he prefers apples).

I did almost all of it within arm's reach of the baby (Chris watched him when I went grocery shopping Saturday and while I switched out the seats in my car), but the best part was that Baby C was happy and content about 90% of the time. He is teething, after all.

So, maybe this Taylor girl is on to something. If I need to get something done, I'll find a way.

Just deal with it.

My mother used to tell my sister and me that she went to work to rest. I never believed it or understood it; after all, how can you possibly rest at work? It defies all laws of biology, physics, and common sense!

But I understand what she meant now.

It's not that she had an easy job. Or easy jobs, as she kept a part-time job (for fun!) on top of her full-time gig (and taught at our church on Saturday mornings). But there were lots of times she would come home to a cranky husband and two girls fighting over who stole whose Guess? shirt out of whose clean laundry pile.

I reflect on it now and wonder how it was my mother was able to keep her cool.

Work was her refuge, as it's becoming mine. When I'm at work, I can plan out the next week's menus (which I'm actually trying to do, since my poor husband has done almost all the cooking since the baby was seven weeks old), write out shopping lists, pay bills, balance my checkbook, and correspond with friends. At work, my days are disciplined, organized, and comparatively easy to navigate. I have daily To Do and Must Do lists, and I'm not struggling to simultaneously entertain and soothe a 5-month-old while I cross things off my list. As many interruptions as I may get at work (and I do get quite a few of them), they are nothing compared to the baby's interruptions when I'm trying to do something as simple and banal as folding laundry. (In fact, I still have a basket left over from the Saturday, only half of which has been successfully put away!)

I think this largely explains why I am in such awe of stay-at-home mothers. Not only do I lack the imagination and creativity to keep my baby entertained, I need a certain degree of structure in my daily routines to keep myself sane.

So, I get it now. It took me several years and having a child of my own to finally understand how it was possible that my mother rested while at work. Work is, comparatively, my easier job. The benefits aren't as great as my motherhood job (how can you possibly top hearing your baby's giggles and coos and watching him grow from a tiny baby to a little boy?), and I don't have as much satisfaction (the house isn't as clean as I'd like it to be), but at least it pays well.

With Baby C's rash almost completely gone (he got a single hive Friday night when I tried to eat a tiny bit of soup that had a few banned ingredients in it), I'm comfortable swaddling him again. So, we'll try getting him to sleep in his room again this week, but I'm not holding my breath. It's rough because his favorite pacifier is still attached to me, and he has this awful habit of pitching a minor fit if I take it away from him before he's ready. "Life's full of disappointments," I told him this weekend. I hope it's not a conversation I need to have with him too frequently.

This morning, I wrapped up the baby and had him sleep for a few minutes while I did my hair and (attempted to do) my makeup. Once I got to work, I think I wiped 80% of it off because it just felt so weird. I'll probably reapply my lipstick after lunch, but that's it. I also tried to wear my contact lenses and got about two and a half hours out of them before I decided that, no, I'm not ready to wear my contacts again. My eyes just aren't used to it anymore. I think it's a combination of my eyes changing shape during pregnancy and my eyes being so dry from lack of sleep. At any rate, I'll try again tomorrow and see if I can get it to 3 hours or more. We'll see.

Saturday, I was finally able to put on a pair of capris that I haven't worn in about a year. (This coming Saturday will mark one year since I knew I was pregnant.) They're a little snug in the hips, still, but I can wear them in public and not be afraid of ripping them if I squat to pick up something or tie my shoes. This was a major coup for me because it means that my body really is getting back to its former shape. I only have one more pair of jeans to squeeze into before I'm officially back to where I was before pregnancy. And, as I'm only four pounds away from my starting weight now (and 17 pounds from my ideal weight), I'm feeling a bit hopeful that I'll be able to wear them again before the end of the year.

At least this crazy diet has done something positive besides clearing up the baby's rash.

In addition to purging the dead computer equipment, I was able to do a bit of cleaning this weekend, which was awesome. It felt good to dust off the ceiling fans and toss some old pillows that had overstayed their welcome. These are the kinds of things I haven't felt like I could do all year (first because I was so bulky that I made everyone nervous if I even stood on my step ladder, and then because Baby C wants constant attention), but Jen came over to entertain the baby, freeing me to change the bedsheets, do four loads of laundry, scour the toilets, dust the ceiling fans, clear off the top of one dresser, shred old bills and other sensitive papers, and assemble Baby C's high chair (I want to get him used to sitting with me for dinner, even if he's still not yet able to sit up unassisted). Jen also was kind enough to take away the box of no-longer-needed baby stuff that I had collected for her, so it freed up even more space in my house. Success!

I'm trying to get back to my Flylady schedule, but it hasn't been easy. I congratulate myself each night if I can get all of the baby's bottles washed and his school bag packed for the next day, let alone all the other things I used to do each night before the baby came. How did my mother manage to do all of this?

Well, on next weekend's schedule is a trip to West Elm to look at my dining room table (and hopefully buy/order it) and some repair work to the baseboard and drywall in my master closet. It seems the grout from the shower came loose and was letting some water seep in to the crevice... and now there's water damage in my closet. [sigh] At least now I have a car that can haul dry wall squares.

I don't know how other women do it. I like to think of myself as a strong, capable person, but I can barely scrape up any real time to myself anymore (besides the commutes to and from work). This is the first chance I've had to sit down at my home computer to write... and even now, I'm feeling guilty because there are other things I should be doing (not including sleep).

Besides, Baby C will be up soon (I think) for a feeding, and there's no use going to sleep until he wakes up.

So, I'm way behind on housework and am completely overwhelmed. I'm tackling it one task at a time, one step at a time, but it remains so very daunting. I'm way behind on laundry, I have dust piling up so high you can almost sit on it (okay, not really - but it's still gross), and my floors are in desperate need of a pass from the vacuum or the Swiffer.

And don't even get me started on all the Thank You cards I still have to write. Baby C is almost three months old and I still haven't sent out notes for all the presents that arrived after his showers.

I know, I know... It's stuff that we all have to go through. After my work day, I have to clean and sterilize all Baby C's bottles and nipples from school, put away the milk I've expressed for the day, get the next day's "lunch" bag ready, feed him, help bathe him (every other day), read to him, sing to him, play with him, feed him, change him, then finally put him down. And somewhere in there, I need to eat (I asked my husband weeks ago to take over dinner-making responsibilities), use the bathroom, take a shower, get my own stuff ready for the next day (because there's nothing more fun than running around in the mornings looking for stuff with an 11-week-old, even if he is in his Bjorn), and manage to get enough sleep to function the next morning.

Tomorrow, I'm not planning on taking Baby C outside. He and I will play together at home. And while Mommy does laundry (some currently running as I type), pays bills, cleans out the refrigerator, purges magazines and junk mail, vacuums, Swiffers, and does all the other things that have fallen to the wayside, he can sit (hopefully quietly) in his Bjorn.

And Mommy can only hope she doesn't fall on her face with Baby C still strapped to her!

Which household chores do you most/least enjoy?
Submitted by falcon.kmc.

I'm of the school of thought that if you don't like doing something that needs to be done, it's best to just do it quickly (and correctly) and get it out of the way so you can move on to something more enjoyable. I don't like doing any chores. I hate vacuuming, I hate dusting, I hate doing the dishes, I hate making the bed, I hate folding laundry, I hate cleaning toilets, I hate scrubbing the shower... Need I continue? But these (and many other things) need to get done, so I have to suck up and do it. Well, until we can afford a housekeeper to come in and do said things each week. As it is, I'm seriously contemplating finding someone to give my showers a good solid cleaning just twice a year (we've been in our house for two and a half years now).

The best part of the chores, though? When it's finished and everything's so nice and clean... until you have to do it all over again.